Hey GenXer. You finally did it. You resigned. Or they finally did it – they let you go. But instead of feeling free, you feel dumb and skittish; incapable of focusing long enough to finish anything.
You wonder what’s wrong with you, or if you made a terrible mistake by leaving. You didn’t. You’re just offgassing.
In today’s episode, we’ll talk about what happens right after you leave corporate, and why the transition often comes with a mental and emotional fog.
I’ll show you how to make sense of that phase, how to give yourself permission to be unproductive, and why this time isn’t a setback. It’s a reset.
Offgassing Is Real, and It’s Normal
Think of your corporate career like a tightly sealed container: high pressure and high control. When you leave, all that built-up energy has to go somewhere.
That’s offgassing: the release of internalized stress, expectations, and performance patterns. It doesn’t mean something’s wrong. It means something’s releasing.
And like any release, it can be disorienting.
You might get weirdly emotional or catch a cold that lasts for weeks. Don’t panic, and don’t rush it. Your heart, mind, and body are rewiring for freedom.
You Are Programmed to Run
There’s an old parable: Every morning, a gazelle wakes up knowing it must outrun the fastest lion. And every morning, a lion wakes up knowing it must outrun the slowest gazelle.
That’s corporate. Constant motion. Run or be eaten.
But you decided that you don’t want to run anymore. Your body will need to catch up to that information.
For months after you leave, it’s common to still feel that pressure to produce and succeed. That’s the residue of fear-based productivity. It’s not your fault. It’s what you’ve been trained to do.
Your system doesn’t know yet that it’s safe. And until it feels safe, you won’t slow down.
So run if you have to, but gently ease down your pace. The more times you check behind you and don’t see a lion, the more you’ll believe that it’s safe to slow down.
What Offgassing Looks Like in Real Life
Offgassing has some phases, which can happen sequentially or all at once. They are normal parts of this major transition you’re going through.
Euphoria phase
You’ll have a strong desire to be productive. That could lead you to alphabetize your spices or start a garden you don’t really want. Go for it!
You’ll also start to detox from an old routine. Even if you hated the commute and early mornings, your body got used to them. You’ll suddenly find yourself in the car, on autopilot, as you drive to an office that is no longer yours.
After a while, the exhaustion may hit. Worn out by a bunch of projects you couldn’t finish, you could find yourself sleeping more, or having to summon massive amounts of energy for simple tasks.
Disorientation phase
Things get a little weird. Your brain turns to mush: you lose words or wander into a room and forget why you’re there. A deodorant commercial might bring on the tears.
You’ll try to make sense of what just happened. You conduct a post-mortem on your work relationships, analyzing situations you misjudged, the people you overestimated, and when you felt betrayed. It’s wild how many stages of a relationship you can go through without the participation of others.
With no title or place to go, you experience the unmooring feeling of being between identities. Without the social interaction of an office, you could feel lonely, relieved, or both. Grief is part of this–not only for the work, but about who you were in that world.
Glimmers phase
A bit of your energy comes back. You’ll realize that you don’t have to stare at your laptop all day. You start to structure your time based on how your brain and body work.
You’ll get outside and follow faint twinkles of ideas. Some of them will make no sense, and all of them are worthwhile. Your experiments will point you to something worth following. (For more on experiments, go back and listen to episode 9.)
What to Do (While You Learn to Rest)
Most of us don’t know how to rest. Not really.
Especially if you’ve been in a high-output environment for years, true rest will take time. At first, resting might look like volunteering for only 20 hours a week. Let yourself do that so your body can slowly unwind the tempo it was trained to keep.
Rest can’t co-exist with shame. If you’re still feeling guilty or nervous about not being productive enough to earn your rightful place on the planet, rest will be out of reach. You just stepped away from something that you worked hard at for a really long time. Give yourself a break.
This isn’t your moment to fill every gap to prove your worth. You are already worthy. It’s your moment to breathe.
And before you say you’re going to read all the self-help books or research businesses for sale, know that offgassing is like being a little drunk all the time. Your thoughts might feel brilliant, but they dissolve quickly. Let your brain settle first.
Self-Determination Theory Can Help
When someone is in a fog and having trouble making basic decisions, I love coming back to Self-Determination Theory. It says we need a sense of Competence, Autonomy, and Connection to feel content in our lives.
So if you need to do something during your offgassing period, focus on those 3 categories.
- Do something you’re good at. Puzzles? Do some puzzles.
- Make a choice for yourself. Want to wear PJs all day? Do that.
- Connect with someone. Did work keep you away from your friends? Go hang out with them.
You don’t have to isolate yourself while offgassing. In fact, your friends and family will appreciate the heads-up that you’ll be low-functioning and strange for a while. Your current state is itself an opportunity for connection. I bet you have some friends who would be delighted to watch reality TV with you for an afternoon.
Use the categories of Competence, Autonomy, and Connection to keep you engaged with other people. It can also help you build a tiny bit of structure into your days, giving them just enough rhythm to feel human.
What to Say (When They Ask)
Word of your departure will get out, and you’ll want to be prepared for the reactions of others. Some people will get excited for you, saying, “you left??? Did you get another job?? What are you doing now???”
Others might project their jealousy and unhappiness right onto you by accusing you of recklessness.
Because you’ve been programmed to have all the answers, your instinct will be to preserve your status and reassure them that you are ok. You do not have to do that.
Whatever reaction they have to your departure is about them, not you.
But if you want a surefire way to shut down nosy inquiries, try this: “I like it.” This comes straight from author Samantha Irby, and I use it all the time. Someone’s in your face asking for explanations and you say,
“I’m taking some time to sort things out and I like it!”
No one is going to tell you you’re wrong for being happy. Instead, they are likely to support whatever bonkers tasks you’ve taken on and offer to help.
Final Take: Let the Fog Do Its Work
Leaving corporate doesn’t drop you into clarity. It drops you into the mushy in-between.
You’ll have days where you wander around and accomplish nothing. Other days when you start to remember yourself. Like grief, it will not be rushed.
Please know that none of this is wasted time. You’re softening the ground for new ideas.
So don’t fight the offgassing. Trust it. The fog will lift, and you’ll become more like yourself in the clearing.
Burn the map. Build what fits.
For a systems angle on GenX career transition recovery, check out Episode 7: Your Exit Isn’t Just About You, GenX
